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Thread: Am I Glass - Authentic Circle

  1. #1
    Dokusei no ai - 毒性の愛 Blayde's Avatar
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    Am I Glass - Authentic Circle

    Am I Glass?
    By Blayde & Lucent

    The way you see threw me
    Like a window open to the public
    Cars rushing through my organs
    It's a deadlock in my veins.

    I complain about the society I live in,
    people think I'm somebody, I'm nobody.
    The stars burn into my flesh and bone,
    to caress the stone in place of a heart.
    Ivy fills my veins, fire spins adrenaline.

    Burning a heart into your eyes,
    That pyropathic stare.
    melting--
    as they re-structure me,
    A rich man, a charitable person.
    To be nothing but a fraud.


    God warned me, as my nerves ache,
    the truth would one day be revealed.
    It was nyce of him, but I couldn't see,
    while craters blocked out my eyesight.
    It was an apocalypse, the way I lived,
    a lie within the shadows of human skin.

    Smoke and mirrors
    Ha!, I am but a wisp,
    Clinging to dead dreams
    And only a reflection,
    Remains.


    I've been stained, but one can't break,
    I refuse to shatter, in desperate need.
    The eyes of insects chills down my tail,
    as the tiny hairs on my neck stand up.
    Throw me around with you're opinions,
    in the end, my soul is still glass.

    An Authentic Circle Production
    Last edited by Blayde; October 25th, 2008 at 09:27 PM
    Twelve13 Designs
    Established 2004.

  2. #2
    Dokusei no ai - 毒性の愛 Blayde's Avatar
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    Re: Am I Glass - Authentic Circle

    Twelve13 Designs
    Established 2004.

  3. #3
    Soule
    Guest

    Re: Am I Glass - Authentic Circle


  4. #4
    Soule
    Guest

    Re: Am I Glass - Authentic Circle

    ....

  5. #5
    Banned
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    Re: Am I Glass - Authentic Circle

    Nice piece fellas. You've done Authentic Circle proud.

    This piece had an original topic and you brought forward some very nice imagery and description.
    Your two writing styles mixed together well and turned this into a great piece

    Nice work

  6. #6
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    Re: Am I Glass - Authentic Circle

    this was cool what I like dmost was the narrative tone and the language of it.
    Kinda just flowed and the multi-syllable word usage never fucked with the flow at all.

    Good structure throughout and also a pretty good collab for A.C.
    peace and stay up.

  7. #7
    Banned Ace of Aces's Avatar
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    Re: Am I Glass - Authentic Circle

    I thought this was good.

    Never noticed that it was a collab till later.
    I barely noticed it becaues most of the styles were similar.
    Not sure if thats good or bad news to you but I think it worked to this pieces favor.

    Though at times, the word choice was too cliche for me, I think that you nailed the emotional aspect enough for this type of topic.

    I don't think there was enough explanation in the first half of the piece though for why one's soul could be depicted as glass?? maybe thats just me.

    good job though, interesting read.

    hit up my piece if ya see it.

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