Wk03 - Tim vs. Maven

[fastforwords]

Sacred Scriptures Week 03

8. Tim vs. 9. Maven

Verses due: Monday, March 26th 2007.
Voting ends: Friday, March 30th 2007.

Please vote on 3 battles.

Goodluck

[Tim]

checkin

g-luck

[Maven.]

you too man.

[Tim]

ill be pulling off the 11:59 buzzer shot

[Tim]

Music and Lyrics
Break!!!!- HipHop

An eternal life blessing listen to HipHop as i escape from this infernal strife stressing
Theres no testing the greatest art form that keeps my heart warm never catch my mic resting
I start to reckon why Graffiti artists get locked up for reppin without a lethal weapon
Its a form of expression without the use of aggression; cops should learn this lesson
We roll through like shopping carts HipHop music is topping charts this is for all you readers
connect the speakers breakers rocking Adidas imbedded sneakers, Im profound to teach ya
Head-spins arouse up-roar from the bleachers; were just the seekers; enough props to founders and teachers
Preachers preach to reach; an art form that involves its own speech; we vibe when we hear a record screech
DJs drop break beats like shattered instrumentals; gather credentials; four types of elemental essentials
The fundamental of rhyming got me writing to fund my mental; each differential in its form n still growth potential
In-fact this art enables me to turn tables into DJ sets as firm cables plug in; crowd jumpin with a ghetto wardrobe thuggin
Sipping on sumethin; crowds fit in to watch DJs spin in beats bumping and get MCs to spit something
Im the DJ running the crowd with my music; while MCs grab the mic and abuse it
Dont get it confused kids; breaking originated as self-defense so watch how u use it
A smart norm leading crowds, Im a rebel in place; scratching and tuning while equalizers fade in the treble and base
Ive got another tune ready to lace; as I rock this way the place; needles scratch records like a new set time in a race
Catch Techniques spinning great beats; MCs spitting more knowledge then the late Greeks
Where else can u find scraped cheeks on break freaks who spin on cardboard for strait weeks
I speak with abstract formalities; but in reality; Im no more but metaphors packed with technicalities
Formal abnormalities; we need to rep HipHop with commonalities and stray away from the brutal fatalities

http://www.muzika.hr/images/Rubrika_21/20041206_jay.jpg
Jason "Jam-Master Jay" Mizell.
1965 - 2002

[Maven.]

I'll be pulling off the 3:13 am, showing up late for the game, saying "hey guys, what'd I miss?" shot. Cool? cool.

Think Twice

at age nine, they played
in a cage lined with hate
and it was fine, cause they
got along fine most days
but a long time displayed
it was a wrong kind of way
to build strong minds that weigh
enough to grow old and gray...

the kids didn't know
their brain was the object
forcing them to grow-
up in a pain-science project
each day, they'd show
they were sane and could function
no dismay they'd know
from labcoats, OR compunction.

when the day finished
and no other soul lingered
what they'd say diminished
without lifting a finger-
and no stray witness
could venture to find
human words to express
what kids pressed in their minds.

shapes and images travelled
between neurons unravelled
not misconstrued or addled
or corrupted by adults-
mounting saddles and riding
synapsal plains in hiding
and siding, with each other
in silence-sister and brother

the decision was made
to make incisions today
no religion could sway
doctors from original ways-
the subliminal stage
was what mattered to they
and the kids world of play
was about to seperate.

and when neither lived
they didn't mourn either kid
forced to dismount and walk
away from inside their head
and when neither lived
they didn't mourn either kid
life became numbers and stats
their death swept under the mat
a forgotten set of conjoined twins.

http://pharyngula.org/images/cephalothoracopagus.jpg

[fastforwords]

Up over closed.

[Johnny 6-feet]

Tim- I think you picked a bland way to do your topic man. Taking this to be about hip-hop was the most obvious way to take the title. Although you did illustraite the art form nicely with strong vocab and a crazy rhyme scheme. Multi-tastic! The dedication to jmj at the end was a nice touch. But the unoriginality of it drags an otherwise dope piece down.


Maven- Dang man, you came dope with this one. You took a hugely original take on the title and brought it to life with a great sense of flow and imagery. The vocab was at the right level and the string of multi's were passed off without a hitch. The narrator freally painted a picture in my head. The twist at the end put the exclamation point on this. A great verse.

Vote- Maven, his creativity gave him the edge in this one. Sorry Tim.

[Engivale]

Tim, your verse was better than you came last week, but I have to agree that it was rather a bland choice of topic... I just mean, in relation to the much more fresh verse Maven wrote, he was very creative with his topic, to the point I had to immediately read his piece after it was done to catch everything he was saying in the context of it being about conjoined twins - I was a little lost the first way through though the multies were good, and then I was like, "Oh! Now I see." It was just a really cool take on the topic and the little observations on such an odd phenomena were pretty clever and fresh. I mean, who would think of trying to get inside the minds of conjoined twins? I guess, Maven would. LoL. Tim it was a nice verse and your flow was on point, but I think too many rhymes like "essential, differential, fundamental, potential" all getting strung together seems really forced... like... I hate the way words like that rhyme, just their last syllable of an otherwise long word that I think takes away from verses... That's just me... The lines to that point of excessiveness that seemed choppy hurt the piece as a whole for me.

vote Maven

[Ntalek]

Tim...damn at your multi usage ability...your take on the topic was to predictable...lacking creativity...yet the content was dope...and the piece connected well...throughout...I think Maven just 1 upped you in the creativity department..

Maven...Nice piece..all while I was reading it I was like wtf is he talking about..which produced anxiousness...I think that you're take on the topic was as creative as it could be and the content made it even better....

though both were great pieces I have to give the vote to Maven fore he had the more creative and entertaing drop...I actually read the battle twice to come to a decision.. but Tim just needed to be a bit more creative and less predictable...

v- Maven..

[Tim]

Maven wins
tim loses